Vancouver Hash House Harriers

Oct 31 2011 Halloween

Sunday, November 06, 2011

The Vancouver Hash House Harriers
Run No.1305 @ 1815, Monday, 31-October-2011
at
Phibbs Exchange, West Side, N. Vancouver
by
Low Blow & Do Me First

So, Pigeon Stool, Cream Filled, Cream Puff, Goes Down Easy, Do Me First! (hare), Squid Lips, Low Blow (hare), Goat Fucker, Manhole, Scrum Guzzler, Heinrik (virgin), Gary (virgin), Pylon & Pero, Aw Fuck It, Plunger, Porno Prick, Nick (briefly) assembled themselves carefully in the parking lot to the West of Phibbs Exchange. Sundry characters alighted or embarked on numerous diesel buses and it was bloody cold - 3 degrees Celsius!

Costumes ranged from the well worn, typified by Creampuff's appearance as a gay 1970ies skii-bum, through the slightly riske as personified by Manhole in dirndl skirt and splendid decolletage (big knockers, to you) and our ever-so slightly edgy Do Me First! in her skimpy cheerleader outfit mmmnn yum yum, and so on to farmer Bob/Chainsaw dude - Plunger, a friesian cow/Serbian sniper by Squid Lips, and then various disconcertingly elusive costumes with neither context nor message such as Scrum Guzzler, Heinrik, and Goat Fucker who came as a beer keg (I know this: it was printed in large letters on the front) with a sort of hunnish helmet on his head and so on. Pigeon Stool defied a catergory as he might have been anything from Pinochio-through-leprechaun-via Maid Marion-to-panto, but even he was outdone by Pylon who appeared to be dressed as himself.

Suffice it to say a grand time was had by all, although Low Blow had to deal with mawkish melodrama from the old biddies on the trails behind PETCETERA who determined that Low Blow represented a threat to society and societies animals which must be defended at all costs. This resulted in less flour and more purple chalk, both opf which LB used sparingly and to devastating effect

And, at the appointed time we left. Slowly at first at a slow trot and descending later into a shambolic ramble as the booze took hold.

The front runners missed the Lynnwood Pub check and were thus deprived of urgently needed amber nectar, but were instead rewarded with their own personal shot check (Fireball & Apple-vitz); which was in-turn denied to those that made the Lynnwwod Pub check. Low Blow's attendance at said Shot Check being mandatory as the trail was substantially unmarked thereafter and required her guidance to bring us through a difficult patch. The chilled hounds left the Shot check heading N alongside the River, beneath the highway and then E towards Seymours Pub and that was where them as wot missed the Lynnwood and the Shot Checkers finally met-up for more beer - yippeee!

After much imbibing we headed off slowly toward the beer check and Chez Blow. The beer check located cunningly behind Plymouth School. Those who had forsaken the trail made their own ways to Chez Blow and were found later soaking-up Blow-Family Chille Con Carne washed down with excellent ale. The Fuzz descended on us with unerring accuracy but were unfazed even though we were captured 'in flagrante' - they appeared to have better things to do relating to things that that go bang in the night. It was amusing to note a number of embittered dads striding up from the depths of the park below the school, their fireworks still dry and whole, having been told-off and sent home by said fuzz.

The, by now, weary hounds at the beer check having slaked their inner dry bits, hurried down the hill in the care of DMF! to join the party at Chez Blow for Down Downs followed by hot food and a thorough, unhurried, soaking of the interior parts with beer. Scrum Guzzler and Squid Lips drank from their new-ish shoes, and an award was given for Best Costume, unfortunately I don't remember who won it, even thought I was judging... So, thanks to Low Blow and the excellent Do Me First! for another Halloween Run, On On!

Next week's run will be performed by Rump Roast and will meet at 1415, Saturday, 05-November-2011 at Douglas Park, close by West 22nd Avenue and Heather Street in Vancouver West.